While many of you have had children out of school since May, our last day of school was yesterday. It’s such a bittersweet time. My children adored their teachers and were both so sad to see the year end. On the other hand they are looking forward to the lazy days of summer. The beach, swimming with friends, long bike rides and concerts in the park. That is what summer is all about. I am making it a priority to unplug and slow down my commitments so that I can fully appreciate and take in the next two months with my sweet kiddos. They are getting so big so fast and I am afraid that if I blink I may miss it.
These two were literally skipping hand in hand from the park. I love these children. They bring crazy amounts of laughter and joy to our days. They challenge us and create in us an urgency to see that this world treat them well. To see that beneath all of our exterior facades, we all feel the same down deep. We hurt, we celebrate, we fear, we love, we care, and we hope.
I want these children to embrace childhood. I have one that feels deeply and thinks too much. She is wise beyond her years and worries too much. I have another that oozes joy and is far too sensitive for his own good. He cares about others and has an innate need to help. He is much too hard on himself and strives to be the best. None of these are flaws. They are unique characteristics that God instilled in them and it is our job to see that they learn to navigate this world with as much confidence, love, respect and honor as they can. In the end . . . it’s each other and how we treat one another that matters. I know that my children will remember how I spoke to them. How I made them feel. They will remember that which built them up, fondly and resent that which tore them down. I am a work in progress as a mom. I am deeply flawed and learn a little more each day about the mommy I want to be.
Driving the other day, hearing this song, I cried. I cried as it holds such a basic and beautiful truth. We are how we treat each other and nothing more. I am how I treat my children, husband, loved ones, friends, and strangers. My children are how they treat their siblings, parents, adults, peers, and the new student who needs a friend. You can listen to the song here if you have not heard it. It really is beautiful. “To be humble to be kind, It is a giving of the peace in your mind, To a stranger to a friend, To give in such a way that has no end.”
I want this summer to be a glorious one for my children. I want them to be children. And I want them to feel and experience the next two months with a present mommy who strives to just embrace it all. I know I will get frustrated, annoyed, short tempered and all the rest. I know that is normal. But we welcome summer with open arms. For us, it is just beginning and that is a beautiful thing. And today I am wishing my beautiful parents a happy anniversary. They are celebrating 48 years of marriage. Such a wonderful example of love and strength. From time to time I open up on this little blog of mine. If you are a new reader and have a moment you can read some more of my reflections here and here. And if you have a son, you may want to read this.
Great post!!!!! 🙂
Such a beautiful post! And wonderful way to start my day w such a simple and meaningful reminder. 🙂
Beautifully said Courtney! You will never regret time spent with your children. Enjoy!
Courtney, you are doing a wonderful job as a mother – enjoy these years and embed the memories where they will never be lost…..
So beautiful – and already the first step to being such a fabulous mommy. Enjoy the Summer x
Beautiful words and so so true. This world needs more love and giving of ourselves. Such a wonderful reminder that there are so many more important things in this world like teaching your children, being in the present and giving yourself to others. Enjoy those sweet kiddos this summer. Can't wait to see your beautiful face in two weeks! xoxo
What a beautiful message. Sadly there seems to be so much meanness in the world these days. So to instill the message of treating each other with respect is a wonderful gift. Have a great summer.
Such a beautiful message!
XO Kelly
http://www.dettecakes.com
What a wonderful read with my morning coffee!
Oh my, every parent needs to read these beautiful, uplifting words….. just beautiful…. Thanking God for Courtney Fernan and the gift He's given her for expressing this!
I love this. LOVE this. Kindness is everything. Being present especially in this social media age is something I'm working on. Beautiful reminder, beautiful kids.
Xoxo
Love this Courtney! As you know our girls are now older, but when we are asked "how we did it" "why are they the way they are" , etc. our answer is very simple we were PRESENT.
I really struggle being totally present sometimes. I REALLY don't want my children to remember me always with my face to my phone or laptop but then it's so hard to put it down when you're in the blogging world. I try though, and I believe you're right, that what they'll remember most is how we made them feel 🙂 xoxo
God,your words really go straight to my heart today as it's been such a difficult day alone with my two (unusually!) grumpy children…And I read your letter to your son and it made me cry.I could have written most of it.
I know a blog is a window on the world and you can decide on what you show or not but I am convinced you're a truly beautiful person.And probably a great mum!
Have a lovely summer…
I think this speaks to a lot of us! Thanks so much for this post ~ it's such a good reminder. It made me teary eyed ~ it's so easy to think that we are the only ones that need to embrace the moment and slow down. Time moves so quickly and I know it's so easy to get wrapped up in it all. We are blessed. I am blessed to have you in my life sweet friend and blessed to have our families grow up together. I will be present and I will slow down….."we are how we treat each other and nothing more." This is my summer mantra ~ thanks for the perspective!
such a beautiful post! love this!
Love this beautiful post! That song stops me in my tracks every time I hear it. It is SO TRUE. With my two littles, I recognize more and more that the way we treat each other is everything. They don't miss a beat. And I've realized that when I do lose my cool, I'm teaching a valuable lesson by apologizing and regrouping. My five year old really notices this, and I can see her internalizing the humble act of apologizing and the gracious act of forgiveness. And I LOVE when I catch her reevaluating her action/reaction to her one year old brother…makes me think that she's learned something about how to treat others!
What a beautiful post Courtney. Really beautifully written. You are an amazing mother and such an inspiration in so many ways to me and I know many, many others. Happy Anniversary to your mom and dad! 48 years! That is wonderful.
My current struggle! Today my daughter told me: "No screens!" She reminded me that her love language is quality time. It's been challenging to find a balance between two children now. Just need to take a step back and appreciate beauty for what it is. Be an engaged observer and act in such a way that when the kids grow up how they will remember me is inner beauty. Plus today's homily was about God being more interested in my beauty inside versus "beauty" on the outside. As always, very timely. God bless your family's summer!
I love this post. It is a great reminder for us all. Thanks so much.